Happy Birthday to Me!~

Make a wish. Blow a cake. Common thing to do when it come to birth day. My this year birthday aren't what I expected and what had I planned. I was thought my Gummy Bear were around on my born day. But his job which doesn't fix demob and mob always make the planned ruined. Sigh! Once again I am disappointed. Cancelled the actual plans; stay at Meritz Hotel, swim in the hotel pool, karaoke session, buffet lunch and dinner. Non of it successful. *Broken-hearted* 

At least this year I got some gifts for my birthday, lunch threat, and dinner threat. My best buddy tried her best to celebrate my birthday last night thou its only 4 of us. She's the best buddy ever. She understand me more than my own family. What a pitiful birthday girl I am. Too much heartache make me doesn't feel anything when it come to disappointment. Am I that bored in front everybody? Might be. I've changed a lot since this few years. I don't involved myself with clubs activities anymore. I don't into alcoholic. I don't into party or lepaking. My routine getting boring day to day. Work from morning to evening, attend college, back home, online, whatsapp with Gummy Bear if he connected to network, then sleep. The same thing repeating day to day. Sien ar! My life so darn boring! I can't go travel, can't shop until drop, can't eat nice meals, can't use nice gadgets. This year air ticket to KL burned just like that. So sayang. Why? Because Gummy Bear did planned to go together so I did cancelled my ticket and hoped that I can go with him. But darn! I wasn't in the plane! Arggghhh!! Guess my Gummy Bear doesn't really know how to taking care his own love relationship. Must be that the reason why his ex leave him? Tak kan gue mau ajar setiap kali ada yang tak kena. Some more I don't have the right to say much when it come to his decision making in matter than involved about his life. Do I have right to advice you? Will you follow what I say? (Gummy bear, if you have chance to read my blog, don't get upset on what I mentioned in my blog as I say what my heart and mind say. Learn from the mistake. Cheers)

Oh my! What a life! I am getting older year to year yet my financial still unstable. I don't see any better way in front. My college fees still left a lot need to settle up. I couldn't get my 'toilet paper' if I don't get to settle the balance. How I wish I can live much better than now. Else better hang myself up. 

I suddenly miss my dad. My life wont be so difficult if dad still around. He will give moral support and an advice whenever I am in difficult moment. I miss his taught. He never forget once my born day. Thou he couldn't give what I want (sometimes I request for something that he cant afford to buy), he will get me something else. Daddy, I miss you so much~ *tearing*

Anyway, Happy Birthday to me. Hoping for better day tomorrow. Next year birthday gift for myself, I WANNA GO TRAVEL! I don't care what will happen, I must go for travel. I don't want another year of disappointment! Its so much hurt, deeply.

xoxo